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Hello! I'm Liane, a 23 year old student and French woman who's been suffering from misophonia for about ten-fifteen years. When I was little, I couldn't stay in the same room when someone had the hiccups, for as long as I can remember. When I was about 12, I started to hate hearing sniffles in class. Then came the mouth and swallowing noises. I really suffered from it at first, because my family thought I was doing it on purpose to annoy them, whereas I was suffering more and more. I still remember the day my father almost punished me for imitating him when he sniffed. 

In class, I spent my days in pain. Sniffling is probably the worst possible form of misophony. When the class is silent, for example during exams, it's often all that's left. At the beginning of high school, my mother and I were finally able to put this disorder into words. This was about 5 years after my first signs of real misophonia, the onset of sensitivity to sniffing, and about 8 years ago. 

At the time, nobody was talking about it. We went to see a psychologist who completely traumatized me by telling me that it didn't exist in his psychiatric textbooks, that there was nothing he could do for me, and then went on to a completely different subject. 

Then began 3 long years in high school, where my condition only got worse. I couldn't finish my day without leaving the classroom crying. All day long, the suffering was such that I started scarifying myself when there was sniffling. I'm not going to describe it, but I think those who aren't concerned with having to put up with misophonia all day, and on top of that having to choose between listening to them lecture and suffering can't understand the suffering I went through. 

The teachers were really concerned, and after a meeting where I explained my situation, we began the long process of finding accommodation for the exams. It wasn't perfect. In class, I can plug my ears, but I can't wear noise-cancelling headphones, I have to be able to listen to the lecture too. But at least, at the end of these three years of suffering, I had a special accommodation for the exam at the end of my primary and secondary education, the one that ends the lycée in France, the baccalauréat. I think, but I'm not sure, that I'm the first person in France to have had a special arrangement for exams because of misophonia. It was a big battle, but oh so helpful! 

For this exam, I had an isolated room with a supervisor, and I passed with honors. I started university almost 6 years ago. I had to transfer my file to the university administration, which was another long and exhausting battle, with several calls. At that point, I was mentally at my wits' end. After a few months, due to a variety of factors including mental exhaustion linked to misophonia, I was diagnosed with depression and stopped by the doctor for a month. Rebuilding my mental health was slow, and I still suffered a lot. In lecture halls with 200 students, there's always someone sniffing around, always. So several times I left crying in front of 200 people. 

At my university, I was still able to get accommodation for written exams. Noise-cancelling headphones and a smaller room, with people with other disabilities. After 3 years and a bachelor's degree, I went on to a double master's with much less student, but even so, the sniffles remained and I sometimes came out in tears. I found it hard to talk about, and I still find it hard today, still a little traumatized by my first experiences. 

Today, I'm no better, but the work environment means I'm less exposed, and I've become mentally stronger. I've adapted by always having noise-cancelling headphones or earphones with me. It's sad to say, but sometimes I think I've got used to suffering, and at the same time, when I'm exposed to it, I think my condition is getting worse because I'm mentally cracking up faster and faster. 

My message of hope? I did get accommodations, they believed me! And I still succeeded in life, I'm now in Norway, in the master thesis of my dreams. So believe in yourself, and talk about misophonia around you.